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Friday, June 14, 2013

Dear Diary: A Slap

I have written some events on paper before. Some in an attempt to start a diary, others were simply venting. I also write to keep it in memories.

"Insanity, that's what it was. The day I slapped the girl I loathed by reaction was the 23rd of Nov, 2009. She came to my class and I had a burning passion to kill her. She didn't seem as bad when she talks but the way she talks rips me apart.
I asked her nicely ( to return a smiley she took off our classroom door), I was almost sweet. I wanted that smiley back, the class didn't need any more crap (because it already looked like shit, we even had a carpet, a smelly closet, and a view of a brick wall)... She asked me if I wanted it ( the smiley face), I knew right then that I'm stepping into a trap by saying yes. She threw it away and told me to fetch it. I was not prepared to be anyone's little bitch, so I slapped her.  It was a mere reaction. what I should've done was walk away from her idiocy and be the mature goody-two-shoes that I am, but I didn't. She approached me, with her 200 pounds of crap, but right before she could even touch me a girl stood in her way, held her off and told me to run. I walked off to the lab, my last period, without looking back. All of a sudden a crowd of girls gathered by the chemistry lab's door. My chemistry teacher lectured me after locking the door. She didn't blame me, but she knew I was better than that. All of the students in my class encouraged me, told me I'm awesome, laughed and joked around over what I just did (I did slap her in front of half of my class). I smiled, but I couldn't stop shaking. The girl was crying from humiliation, I tried apologizing but what good would that do? Even the (art) teacher warned me to watch my back and to walk in groups.
Even though I started it I somehow managed to be the innocent victim. I'm forever to be her target. At least now my feelings towards her are neutral."

I'm mean, I know I shouldn't have, but I hold no regrets. I hated her, always had. She used to constantly come to our class even though she's a grade younger, and make fun of our classroom and leave. It was inevitable, the more I saw her, the more I hated her, and the more I thought of beating her up, until she finally crossed the line, I snapped and slapped her.

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