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Monday, February 23, 2015

Much to Do

Friday was the girls gathering, then saturday the vigil for my 3 muslim relatives, yes it turned out I was related to them. The father is my mom's cousin. Sunday I went to the Syrian refugee charity dinner event which turned out to be super fun. I got to meet some people and laugh and embarresse myself as usual. I also auctioned! well, i was the only one apparently. but, I bought a teeth whitening kit. At first noone wanted it, so it was auctioned off for half its original price (350$), then noone wanted it and so it was reduced to a 100$, I was still hesitant, but I realize this is a good deal. It got then further reduced to 75$ at which the table encouraged me to take it, and I did. No regrets, that's more than 75% off and I love it. I'll get to whiten my teeth! I actually need to fix them up, but it wouldn't matter if I whiten it first, right?

Today my friends in micro told me that they never saw me mad before. I don't know how they expect to see me angry at school, people need to compose themselves, besides, I wasn't that close to her. Then nicole pointed out that even in karate i'm never mad, and that I punch people while smiling which makes me look scarier!
That comment made me laugh and another guy agreed. Apparently I hit, hurt, apologize all while smiling.

Bake sale is tomorrow! WAH!

Friday, February 20, 2015

Failed It!

I failed my driver's test this morning, it really sucks. I've got 63 points, when I needed 45 or less to pass. I can do another test next week, but it's really frustrating to do the whole procedure of calling axis NS and booking and going there, and calling someone to borrow their car. It's so annoying. It's really embarrassing too, I feel sorta ashamed that I was not able to pass.

On other news, I went to a little gathering. they were my sister's friends and such, but I was also invited. We played taboo, which was extremely fun and I was good at it too. I looked SO HOT to the point that I told my Star that if  I wasn't me I'd marry me. I'm hot, smart, funny, and somewhat nice. I've got everything going on in all the right places and my personality is amazing. I straightened out my hair, then I curled some strands and messed them up a bit, while pulling back a few. That made my hair not so flat, but messy the way it always is, yet neat in the aspect that it wasn't frizzy and such. 

Speaking of Star, I talked to him on the phone while eating fried chicken, and doing the dishes. I still need to work on my paper, and Revi is coming over tomorrow for a sleepover. Augh..busybusybusy.

Peace,
M.D.

Things to do.

Yesterday's karate class, guess what? palpitations again! They happened at the very first punch of warm up. It was a three punch, step in, head, stomach, stomach. The first head punch I did in the whole class, and I got my palpitations. They didn't go away until I sat down and relaxed, focussed on my breathing and such. It was a little embarrassing, because we were supposed to be doing kicks by then, and I was just sitting, and sensei looked at me for a bit. I'm glad she didn't point it out. I've been sitting at random moments in her class more often now. I don't wanna excuse myself every time.
She drove me home yesterday, and I should've told her bout my palpitations. I mean, I did tell her before, but how is she supposed to remember something I told her about a year or more ago? I know she'll be okay with it too.

I also have to write this stupid paper that I barely started. It's due in three days, but there's a party today, a funereal tomorrow, and a dinner after, then school starts again. God, I'm gonna legit cry.

I have my driving test in a few minutes, pray for me.

Peace,
M.D.

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Dear Diary,

forgot to mention that I had palpitations three times in the last karate classes; Thursday, Saturday, and Tuesday.

I suppose I didn't have any in Sunday!

Also, my sister loved her gifts!! and the card..and the food! x3 yey

Sunday, February 8, 2015

mute

I really hate myself. Fought with sis again, over something ridiculously stupid. But I wanted to let her know it bothers me that whenever she forgets or doesn't have time to do something I would have to be the backup. The stupid gift, we both had to wake up early and I told her I'd be coming back home to shower and get dressed after karate, but she thought it would be enough time to wrap a gift.
She only told me this in the morning, had I known about it yesterday, I would've timed myself much better throughout the day, or done it yesterday, or woke up earlier. She told me the same morning, because she wanted to do it herself and then noticed that she ran out of time.

Then she was angry that we chose to watch The Imitation Game because it's sad, and she has general anxiety and can't handle drama. I didn't know it would have a sad ending, I didn't know he was gay or that he would suicide. I told her about it before we watched it though. I told her it's about breaking the nazi code using the first ever computer, and she thought it was boring. She let me talk to the girl though, she told me to arrange it with her...cause she didn't want to do everything. It's because the girl talks to her ..not me when she wants to hang out. The girl and I both thought it would be a nice movie, and it is, but my sister was aiming for a comedy. I told her though, but i guess she didn't hear me..or I didn't emphasize it enough. i hate me..I hate that I can't talk or communicate well...and I hate that I can't deliver emotions either. I hate that I even have to. I hate it..I hate shit like that.

Now she's ignoring me, but she did buy me half a sub which was nice I guess.

She also thinks I'm lying when I complemented her haircut..because I pointed out that it should be layered more than that. She pointed out that my haircut should have been shaven at the end, and she kept pointing that out several times...so, I don't know where's the difference. I thought she wanted me to tell her when I notice something wrong..and AUGH ...so stupid.. I don't know how to speak to my own sister..I wish I was mute or dead or something I hate talking. HATE IT. and she hates it when i text her...and she's overly sensitive and overly emotional and overly touchy..and hugs and cuddles..and touching..and that suffocates me..but I try to do them too because I don't wanna offend her, but it's shit. it's half hearted and she knows it..and I'm never getting married..

augh...she doesn't even acknowledge me lol


Sunday, February 1, 2015

International Hijab Day!

Oh Lord almighty, thank you. I just saw my first midterm's grade for microbiology and I got a 95.4% in it. The midterm is only 10% but that means I already have 9.5 of it. Which is AMAZING!
On my Learning psych course, I managed a 96% on the first midterm, this one has 25% of the total.

God, I hope I can keep this up. Please, God, I hope I do. My GPA is the only thing fighting for me for medschool, because I know that my MCAT scores will be shit. But, if I can manage a great GPA average, then maybe I will have a better chance of being considered.

On ..completely unrelated news.
My friend Revi decided that tomorrow, on behalf of international try a hijab day, that she will wear one too. No, I never told her about this day, but I think she picked it up from my facebook. Isn't she the greatest? I don't care if we never speak ever again, I'll never forget how sweet this woman is. She puts me to shame. The idea of this day is to put yourself in a muslim girl's shoes or rather hijab before you judge. The sad part is, that most people who probably participate are already the sweetest, most open minded people, then again it will be awesome to see my friend's reaction if any! I shouldn't pry though.
She's coming over tomorrow morning so I can see her, and possibly help her out. House is a usual mess, but oh well!

Also, my sister loved the food I made yesterday. and I love her brownies, and we seem to be getting along very well. alhamdulellah

Thank God,
Peace,
M.D.